Parenting is as much a learning
business for us as traveling through childhood is for our children.
Parenting is one of the most difficult jobs that nature has provided
us with. Being a parent means not only being sensitive to each child
and each situation; it also calls on us to stretch our imagination as
we respond to the constant challenges our children present us with.
Children can be demanding, difficult and defiant! No advice can
possibly make you get it right every time, but a few points kept in
mind would take you a long way in dealing with daily discipline.

1. The miracle of touch.

Out of the five senses touch is
considered to have healing qualities. Whether it takes the form of
hugs, horseplay or simply holding hands on the way to school, loving
physical contact provides a simple and almost unconscious way of
showing you care.

1. Keep the fun alive.

With all the commitments at home and
work, most parents forget the word “fun” aspect of
parenting. Young children love jokes and being silly. The familiarity
of special words, pet names and silly voices always manage to
brighten a child’s day.

1. Flexibility helps!

Parents sometimes expect too much of
children. They ten to forget that children have a vantage point that
is above three feet lower that an adult’s! bending down to get a
child’s eye view of a situation can save most upsets, accidents and
mishaps.

1. Good manners go a long way.

Little children do not always know or
remember “the right thing” to say in every situation. They
should be encouraged to use the terms such as please, sorry, thank
you where appropriate. It’s amazing the difference the right words
can make. They can often help from the right attitude too.

1. Children need limits.

Being cool helps but children also
need to learn the difference between what is acceptable and
unacceptable behavior and understand that behavior has consequences
whether pleasant or unpleasant. Idle threats should be avoided at all
times and always mean what you say.

1. Being in charge does not mean
   being a tyrant!

Parents often forget that children are
individuals and tend to mold them into ideal persons that they want
their children to be. Although there are times when “because i
said so” is appropriate, more often than not it is better to
give a reason for what you have said. Even adults make mistakes and
children have reasonable ideas. In such situations parents should
apologize in the same way we expect our children to apologize us.

1. Check your “dont’s” No
   one likes a lot of negativity.

It sounds like nagging. Too many
“dont’s” can hinder a child’s natural instinct to explore.
Unless it is a life and death situation of something that will harm
the child in some way, avoid using this word. Always check whether
you are using it for your convenience or for child’s safety. Good
behavior should be rewarded with praise, encouragement or a hug
rather than with sweet treats or money.

1. Children should be children!

Parents often make the mistake of
expecting children to be mini adults and be have the way they want
them to behave. Children are naturally clumsy, forgetful, and
accident prone. Therefore they should never be punished for pure
childishness. Bad behaviors should be dealt with justly and the
punishment appropriate to the crime. Naughtiness is sometimes
prompted by boredom or a feeling of neglect. At such times the
solution will involve providing a stimulating activity for the child
or giving him attention.

1. Being “in control” is
   not really “controlling”.

Children do not need to be “Controlled”
but when they deliberately misbehave parents should be “in
control” of the situation. They should effectively manage and
guide their behavior. Often the expression on your face or the tone
of your voice will be enough to deter all but the most determined
little ones. Yet there are times when just a stem face or a word
would not do. Then appropriate and tangible action is required.

1. “Spare the rod” but do
   not spoil the child.

Children’s behavior sometimes calls for
sterner measures than just a small punishment by way of forbidding
what he likes to do or sending him to the room. Deliberate, repeated
defiance and purposely hurting another child are situations that need
to be dealt with immediately. A well timed smack can be most
effective way of correcting this type of behavior. A controlled smack
(on the hand, leg or the bottom) will help your child associate this
unacceptable behavior with unpleasant consequences and deter him from
repeating it. make sure he understand what he did wrong and encourage
him to say sorry. However, by your words and actions let your child
know that although his behavior may have been unacceptable, he is
always loved.

Posted September 13th, 2008 by admin No Comments » This entry was posted on Saturday, September 13th, 2008 at 12:01 pm and is filed under Family. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.